Hubby and I have always loved to get away together. Before we moved to Canada last year, we would go on holiday at least once every three months. My husband is a hard worker and he isn’t great at taking care of himself and making sure he gets enough rest so holidays was the only way I could make sure he gets a break.
With the news about the recurrence and subsequent treatments and hospital appointments, going on holiday hasn’t been top on our list. We went to California in March for a few days and when we got back, we made plans for Florida in December. We booked off December 3rd – 12th for the holiday and we have looked forward to this day since then.
I found out today at my 2-week post chest tube insertion that it is not advisable that we make this trip. Basically, a lot of the fluid in the lining of the lungs has been replaced by air as a result, being in the high could be very dangerous due to altitude and pressure changes. In all of 5 minutes, the holiday we have looked forward to for the last 9 months was squashed.
I have been pretty devastated since that appointment, not for me but for my amazing husband who cannot get the rest he so much deserves because of this stupid disease. I remember thinking this morning about how inconvenient cancer is. It just gets in the way of everything. I am sat here thinking about everything cancer has taken from me and I am so so angry. We deserve a break, we deserve to be able to get away as a family and enjoy some alone time but even that is too much to ask.
Miserable, sad, tired, exhausted, fed up are some of the emotions I feel right now. I will cry myself to sleep and pray I wake up to learn we can still go on our trip. I need something good to happen to us soon, we all need a break and we could use some good news soon. Please say a prayer for us…